ILR, divorce, stay at home mom - where does that leave me?

pettle · Post by **pettle** » Sun Aug 07, 2011 7:29 pm

my husband and i got married in 2008 and have been on ILR for almost a year but there is a chance we will be getting divorced due to his temper and we have a 1.5 year old son I stay at home and watch while he works. Where does this leave me? I don't know if my status changes or where I would turn, I have no job and if I did I would have no one to watch my son/no money to pay for it as my experience is in admin only. I wouldn't have anywhere to move so I don't even know where we would live. Its such a mess, honestly. I could move to america (where im from) and get a job as my mom could watch him for free but i don't want to take him away from my husband, i would never do that so i feel stuck. Any help/advice would be appreciated. Thanks

Post by **Casa** » Sun Aug 07, 2011 8:06 pm

Your status doesn't change as you already have ILR which you retain even if you divorce. You should seek advice from a family lawyer regarding what settlement and maintenance you would be entitled to and what financial support your husband would legally have to contribute for your child. As you are no longer subject to immigration control you should also be entitled to benefits and perhaps housing as a single parent. Your local Citizens Advice Bureau will be able to guide you on this.
Financially I'm sure it's not as bleak as it may appear at the moment.

Post by **vinny** » Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:43 am

Perhaps you can train your partner?

Consider getting British citizenship before divorcing.

pettle · Post by **pettle** » Mon Aug 08, 2011 11:40 am

we spoke (again) and are going to try to save our marriage. i still love him and want to be with him but can't if his temper goes out of control the way it has been, i want my son to have normality in his life but he needs to be able to see both his parents as well, difficult situation. i can get british citizenship in october but since its in london i dont know my way around and would prefer if someone went with me so we will see. right now my concern is saving our marriage. but i need to be realistic and we've been down this road before, if need be i might need to find out via CAB if i would even be entitled to any sort of help on ILR if that happens. Thank you for your help x

Post by **vinny** » Mon Aug 08, 2011 12:03 pm

Good. Help him deal with his anger.

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ILR, divorce, stay at home mom - where does that leave me?

ILR, divorce, stay at home mom - where does that leave me?